Silly Season 2009-2010

Well, it’s starting to affect me again. The end of October and next month, Thanksgiving. The start of the silly season, a period of time in which emotions can run rampant with highs and lows until after Valentines Day. I’m feeling the blues! No girlfriend right now to share in the festivities of the upcoming holidays.

I don’t mind not having Thanksgiving dinner (as I dislike turkey!), but then comes Christmas, and that will put me in to a tailspin. I love to give gifts to a girlfriend, and this year will not have the opportunity I feel. Of course, I have been a very good boy, so may be Santa will give me one? If he does, he better not look for a chimney.. I live in Florida! LOL.

Next, comes the two holidays that are the worst when not in a relationship. Spending New Years Eve without female companionship basically sucks, and in February, there is Valentines Day to contend with! Yes indeed, the 2009-2010 Silly Season, will not be a happy one for this author. However, I will have almost a year to make restitution!

Not waiting for my ship to come in…

How many of you guys and gals out there in the Blog-o-sphere, during the aftermath of a major breakup, decide to wait a while before entering the dating game… again? How long does one contemplate, perpetuate, and simply wait before feeling desperate, and starting all over again.

Sure it hurts, it hurts like Hell. And thoughts range from “I’ll never find another person like her/him” to “I feel like I can’t/won’t ever do this again”. But that is where the human spirit takes over. We all want to be with someone. We were not put on Earth to be alone. Everybody needs somebody and there is someone for everyone. At least that is what I have always heard! lol

So, using the adage of “If you fall off a horse, get right back on it and start riding” is quite apropos. The longer you wait, the longer it takes, and then “fear of” sets in and makes the situation even worse!
The moral of this blog is “Don’t wait until your ship comes in, start rowing out to it”!

Feeling like a human ATM

When does a guy living a sugar daddy type lifestyle learn to say NO to a pretty young woman? To basically cut her off! I, personally enjoy it, as do many men, but when does the balance become so slanted that it no longer is enjoyable? The whole idea of the sugar daddy lifestyle is to be able to spoil, mentor, and have some nice arm and eye candy. And that is all well and good. But here is my dilemma.

I met this young lady a few weeks ago through an online dating site that embraces that particular lifestyle and all seemed well and good… at the beginning. We met for drinks, found we had chemistry and attraction between us, and were both looking for same thing. It seemed like a perfect match, and for a while it was. We mutually agreed to see each other once every two weeks to go out to fancy restaurants, and high brow cultural events. She is almost 20 years younger than me, but still not a kid by any means. At first, I lavished her with gifts, and I was her Prince Charming, when she needed money, I was her Knight in shining armor, when I took her to Europe, I was an angel, and when I cut her off, I was the scum of the earth!

So why did I cut her off, you ask? It is simple. When everything given freely becomes expected, not appreciated, and when it is never enough, it soon changes the scenario from sugar babe to gold digger. Yes it is a lifestyle definitely not suited for everyone, and it can and does work as an alternative lifestyle, but both parties concerned have to feel they are getting something out of the relationship or what’s the point! May be it was my fault? May be it was both of our fault, but I refuse being treated like an ongoing human ATM.

Soccer moms make me dribble

I happen to find that particular statement to, at times, be true, as many soccer moms are quite hot. So, what exactly are soccer moms? The answer is simply this; she is usually a middle class woman around 35 to 45 years of age, living a wealthy suburban lifestyle, and who spend much of her time driving her school age children to and from sporting events in their new Land Rover SUV‘s. It doesn’t have to be soccer, but that is where the phrase took off in popularity and has stuck.

I happen to be a single, middle aged guy who had the opportunity to spend time with a buddy at a soccer game in which his tween daughter was playing. To confess, I was never much of a soccer fan, as I did not grow up around the sport, but I do have an eye for attractive ladies. Right off the bat was 3 or 4 gorgeous moms pressed up against the chain link fence, rooting for their children with passion. I mean they were really in to the game. I started wondering why they drove and then stay to watch their children play the sport and not their husbands. It seemed a bit odd to me…. at first!

I decided to try a little pick up maneuver and do a little “research”. I proceeded to that fence, right next to those hotties, and started shouting out my friend’s daughter’s name. About 15 minutes later, and with the onslaught of a raspy voice brought on my shouting, one of those soccer moms initiated the conversation by asking, “Which one is your daughter”? I told this beauty standing next to me who I was shouting for and that she wasn’t my daughter, but my niece! OK, little white lie, so sue me! As she watched the game, I found myself watching her! She wasn’t a kid, she was all woman, and a beaut at that, wearing nice designer shorts and top, and boasting a delicious tan.

We started chit chatting and before long she told me that she was divorced because her husband never had time for anything but work. I asked her if it wasn’t for her child playing, was she in to the sport. She actually told me she was a “soccer mom” in those words, and that it was a terrific way to meet guys. I was at first taken back by her comment. Next week, I’m meeting this mom-babe at the next game. I might even start to like the sport. I already know how to dribble! lol

MILF’s and Cougars are HOT

While it is true that many older men enjoy the company of younger women, the fact that women today stay young looking a lot longer than their predecessors, makes them a hot commodity among younger guys. They possess a most desirable trait…experience.

To explore this ”phenomenon”, one must first know what the terms MILF and Cougar’s mean. MILF is an acronym for Mothers I’ld Like To Fu*k. While some may be presently married, and so potentially dangerous, it is the recently divorced ones that are prime targets to pursue! Cougars, on the other hand, are “more experienced” than MILF’s. In other words, she has been around the block a few times. She has EXPERIENCE. Usually, Cougars range in age from 40 years old and up, usually divorced but may never have been married, the predatory feline.

With women’s emancipation, came new freedoms to seek out, explore and enjoy. Honestly, both can be and are, very hot women. Younger guys are always at odds when dating girls of their own age. The girls want the guys to be “more” than they can be at their age. They want immediate change, and guys resent that. The guys, being visual creatures, see the older woman as totally exciting in nature. They cherish the fact that with age comes experience. It is a maturity that makes them so attractive. And they are women, not girls. They are not flowers blossoming, they are the flowers in full bloom. And older women nowadays are a far cry from women of yesteryear. I don’t know if it is genetics, cosmetic surgery, or damn good spa’s, but many of the women that fall in to this age group, far outshine their younger counterparts.

From the woman’s point of view, younger guys are exciting, carefree, and fun. And they have stamina and staying power, always a plus. And younger guys have the same effect as older men and younger women. They make good eye and arm candy!

MILF’s and Cougars are here to stay. It is a win-win attraction for both male and female.

She went totally blonde on me !

Well, she did it! She said she was going to, but being a skeptic, I didn’t believe her. No, not Kim Kardashian, but my girl! And I am so pleased she did so. It started off a month ago, during dinner. She nonchalantly asked me, would you love me as a blonde? I told her I would love her with any color hair (except green, blue, or pink!) and didn’t think any more about it. Less than a week later, she called me on the cell. There was trepidation in her voice I could tell. I asked her what was wrong upon which she answered, “I hope you like a blonde”! That got me thinking, gee, would it make any difference to me? It’s not my hair, it’s hers to do whatever she likes to it. “Oh, and I got it cut short.. very short” too. You have to understand, she had long, dark brown hair flowing half way down her back. That was the only way I knew her. Now I started getting nervous about it!

Initially, all that came out of my mouth was, “How short”? “Very short” was her reply. I actually gasped at the thought! I think the shock of that got to me. “So, when are you coming over to see it? How about…now“! I said alright and headed out to her house. I convinced myself that if I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t say so figuring it would grow back in time and she could always dye it back.

I get to her house, actually feeling anxious as to “who” will welcome me. My brain had a mindset of long dark hair and I was about to tread on new grounds with her. The world of blondeness! So, I sheepishly knock on the door, take a deep breath, and close my eyes! The door opens, she laughs at my scrunched up face and closed eyes, and gives me a kiss.
It was during that kiss that I opened my eyes, and I’m so glad I did! She looked great, no, better than great, she looked fabulous! I couldn’t believe my eyes! She glowed with her sunny new color and short doo. The amazing thing was it boosted her confidence and my..err…it boosted us both!. She became assertive, super sexy and sultry, happy with herself. I was very happy with herself too! May be it is true that blondes do have more fun.

So, what do you think ?
Hey baby, No time to think. Lets hit the sheets !

Jealousy – Battling the Green Eyed Monster

Have you ever been caught up in a situation where jealousy, that green eyed monster rears its ugly head? Most people unfortunately have experienced this at some time in their lives. And no one relishes being in such a position, or as the recipient. Jealousy is not necessarily a female concept. It rears its head to males also. It crosses both genders, but I think that women have a higher susceptibility towards it, as they are more emotionally driven than men.

Sayings like, I’m jealous of her, she’s jealous of him, are all too common terms.
They are feelings and expressed emotions … very strong feelings and emotions!
Jealousy is a complex reaction to a certain set of emotional thoughts and behaviors which manifest themselves outwardly, hence the term green eyed monster or green with envy.

How can jealousy affect a relationship? It can influence a couple in a positive way if it is just mild jealousy. It can influence you to do better, to act as a form of competition. In this instance, if both the couple are competitive by nature, mild jealousy can be a good thing. It can, however, destroy that relationship. When the jealousy becomes too strong, it becomes a ticking time bomb, eventually exploding into shards of angry jaded shrapnel. Jealousy can and does bring out the worst in people. The solution therefore is open COMMUNICATION before it gets totally out of hand. Communication is required from BOTH sides with lots of understanding and patience, as the feelings can be quite intense. Remember, it takes two to tango!

Sugar daddy vs. The Gold digger Relationship

As much as alternate relationship lifestyles are becoming more and more commonplace and accepted in today’s society, gold diggers and sugar daddy’s have survived. In the present state of our economy, it has emerged stronger than ever. It might even be a product of economy. In the time of the California Gold Rush, circa 1800’s, the men packed up all they had and headed out west to seek their fortune, many times leaving their wives or family behind. It was not easy times, but the possibility of striking it rich was a distinct possibility. The men were actual gold diggers, that is, miners, panning for gold. It was those women who hung around the miners (for their money, obviously), that were coined gold diggers. In those days, times were rough for both men and women. People left everything, packed up, and headed out west to strike it rich! Many did, and like nowadays, where there is a rich man, there will be some shrewd, conniving female who wants a piece of it! And then again, in those days, women were more of a beauty depreciating asset, so they struck when the iron was hot, so to speak.

The modern definition of a gold digger is a woman who associates with or marries a rich man in order to get valuables from him through gifts or a divorce settlement. But the gold digger scenario is not a relationship, per se. It is a one sided affair specifically generated by the female to snare the rich male, to fleece him of his wealth for her own. As long as there are women in the world, a proportion of them will be strictly out for themselves. They couldn’t care less for the man, as long as he showers her with wealth and gifts, and wouldn’t hesitate to leave him the minute she gets cut off. She sees the man as a male ATM machine, and what’s in it for her.

Enter the Sugar daddy. This is a mutual relationship between a rich older man and a woman, usually a younger woman at that. The term sugar daddy is a modern variant of the word daddy. Daddy describing the age difference between the couple, and prefacing it with sugar, which is the gifts given. Hence the name, Sugar daddy! So, the modern definition of sugar daddy is that of a wealthy, usually older man who gives expensive gifts to someone much younger in return for companionship or sexual favors.

The biggest difference between a gold digger “relationship” and that of a sugar daddy is that, in the sugar daddy relationship, it is mutually beneficial to both parties concerned. The usually older man has wealth, and affluence which affords him all the luxuries, that life has to offer. A very attractive thing for a younger woman to experience. But sugar daddies have discriminating tastes. They will not be seen with a plain, ordinary, or below average girl. The sugar babe is almost always a young knockout, his eye and arm candy. She will always turn heads in a crowd! And she knows this to be true. She loves the lavish lifestyle, and is usually of higher maintenance than a male her age could ever afford. They have a unique, mutually beneficial relationship, one in which both sides know their roles, and in which they are both happy! In the true sugar daddy lifestyle, it is a totally win-win situation, as opposed to the gold digger who is interested in only her!

Older Men Dating Younger Women

Much has been written on the subject of older, mature men dating younger women. Putting aside, for the moment, the age gap difference between the genders, both can enjoy the benefits that can arise from such a relationship.

Love transcends all boundaries, so why not see it simply as ageless love. Sure, every senior male would enjoy immensely, that trophy date, that piece of eye candy hanging on to his arm, listening to every word he speaks. He is instantly revitalized, seen by his peers as a stud, the ultimate seducer. He, by proxy of his age, is for the most part, secure emotionally and financially, as well as having a wealth of life experiences ranging from childhood through his induction in to A.A.R.P.!

If he happens to be an elder gent who has attained affluence during his lifetime, and has the finances and connections to make a younger woman happy, or help her in her career, he is a sugardaddy. That does not make him a lech, or pervert. Not by any means, whatsoever! The sugardaddy type of relationship is one of giving what one has for something he wants. The man has the resources, the means to provide for the younger lady. He can spoil her, wine and dine at the fanciest of restaurants, travel to far off exotic locales. This something every young female would love. Chances are very high that younger guys could never afford to provide such experiences. He may even become her mentor. By mentor, I mean have the ways and means of advancing their careers, with only a modicum of effort.

It is truly a mutually beneficial relationship. One in which everyone wins. The older man feels his oats again, he gets about with her companionship, it boosts his morale. The younger woman gets what she usually can’t get from dating her contemporaries, luxury, excitement, travel, and all the spoils. This is not a novelty, for those in this type of relationship, it is reality!

Friends with Benefits, No Strings Attached Dating

In today’s world of dating and relationships, the N.S.A. or No Strings Attached type dating has become ever so popular. Maybe that is so simply because of its definition. If something has no strings attached, then there are no obligations or expectations. It could be a sweet ride for those who are in to this form of casual dating encounter.
The NSA type of relationship goes by many names, but it is for the most part, a discreet type of relation. Take for example, a wife who’s husband’s job takes him away for days, weeks, or months. She gets lonely, but doesn’t want to leave him, or vice versa. This kind of discreet relationship can actually work for them, as it fulfils a need for both parties concerned!

Friends with benefits, is another widely used term. Similar expressions are a fling, a booty call, a little something on the side.
I’m sure you get the idea! I personally think this type of relation is more male provoked. I say this simply for the reason that males are less likely to commit (mostly due to fear!) than females. This relationship, at least as seen on the various online dating sites, is initiated by men who are married (usually for a number of years), but who don’t want to get divorced from their wives, or younger women who don’t want a true relationship, but the “benefits” of such without the drama. Those women seek a more mature discreet version of this phenomenon. They are looking for sugar daddies who can spoil, wine and dine them, and show them a real good time. While this form of casual dating has become somewhat accepted, it is not this author’s way. Just call me old-fashioned. What next, cybersex becomes the norm?