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Archive for February, 2009

Thompson 2008

Much has been written on the subject of older, mature men dating younger women. Putting aside, for the moment, the age gap difference between the genders, both can enjoy the benefits that can arise from such a relationship.

Love transcends all boundaries, so why not see it simply as ageless love. Sure, every senior male would enjoy immensely, that trophy date, that piece of eye candy hanging on to his arm, listening to every word he speaks. He is instantly revitalized, seen by his peers as a stud, the ultimate seducer. He, by proxy of his age, is for the most part, secure emotionally and financially, as well as having a wealth of life experiences ranging from childhood through his induction in to A.A.R.P.!

sugardaddy

If he happens to be an elder gent who has attained affluence during his lifetime, and has the finances and connections to make a younger woman happy, or help her in her career, he is a sugardaddy. That does not make him a lech, or pervert. Not by any means, whatsoever! The sugardaddy type of relationship is one of giving what one has for something he wants. The man has the resources, the means to provide for the younger lady. He can spoil her, wine and dine at the fanciest of restaurants, travel to far off exotic locales. This something every young female would love. Chances are very high that younger guys could never afford to provide such experiences. He may even become her mentor. By mentor, I mean have the ways and means of advancing their careers, with only a modicum of effort.

It is truly a mutually beneficial relationship. One in which everyone wins. The older man feels his oats again, he gets about with her companionship, it boosts his morale. The younger woman gets what she usually can’t get from dating her contemporaries, luxury, excitement, travel, and all the spoils. This is not a novelty, for those in this type of relationship, it is reality!

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friendswbenefit

In today’s world of dating and relationships, the N.S.A. or No Strings Attached type dating has become ever so popular. Maybe that is so simply because of its definition. If something has no strings attached, then there are no obligations or expectations. It could be a sweet ride for those who are in to this form of casual dating encounter.
The NSA type of relationship goes by many names, but it is for the most part, a discreet type of relation. Take for example, a wife who’s husband’s job takes him away for days, weeks, or months. She gets lonely, but doesn’t want to leave him, or vice versa. This kind of discreet relationship can actually work for them, as it fulfils a need for both parties concerned!

Friends with benefits, is another widely used term. Similar expressions are a fling, a booty call, a little something on the side.
I’m sure you get the idea! I personally think this type of relation is more male provoked. I say this simply for the reason that males are less likely to commit (mostly due to fear!) than females. This relationship, at least as seen on the various online dating sites, is initiated by men who are married (usually for a number of years), but who don’t want to get divorced from their wives, or younger women who don’t want a true relationship, but the “benefits” of such without the drama. Those women seek a more mature discreet version of this phenomenon. They are looking for sugar daddies who can spoil, wine and dine them, and show them a real good time. While this form of casual dating has become somewhat accepted, it is not this author’s way. Just call me old-fashioned. What next, cybersex becomes the norm?

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blondes4

Well, are they? That line has been around forever, so may be there is some truth to that statement. I wonder how the stereotype got its induction in to society. I suppose, regardless of how it started, it has endured. While I think men are programmed to react to blondes, from mild curiosity to outright ultimate in sexiness, a lot of it probably comes from advertisements. We always see the blondes getting the most handsome of guys, and are always portrayed as the sexy bombshells in the movies. But, it usually comes at a price. It is a double edged sword. Blondes can get an instant reputation as being dumb ditz’s. As with most reputations, once labeled, they are hard to remove. Marilyn Monroe was one, for example. She could have been a genius, but she got labeled!

Due to the fact that we live in a technological, visual world, we get bombarded by media trying to get a point across, or to make you buy a product, which greatly contributes to the “Blondes having more fun” mentality. It is a great advertising scheme for hair color treatments, beauticians, clothes designers, the movies. In other words, blondes sell, and so they are promoted to goddess class. We, being guys, have become conditioned to accept this! Take your average Joe on the street, and have 2 average Jane’s walk by, with one being dark haired, the other being blonde. Ask the guy to describe the dark haired girl versus the blonde, and see who gets more results.

Ok, I just can’t resist. My two favorite blonde lines:
“I’m a natural blonde, the carpet matches the drapes!” and
I’ve decided to go blonde, or I’ll dye trying!

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social-network

Social networking has become so very popular in today’s society. Networking sites like Facebook and MySpace and the various blog sites are amongst the most popular. People, unfortunately, put in more information than they should, and many problems can and do occur as a result. This also has a bearing on online dating sites. There is a rise in crime and stalking because individuals just write too darn much about themselves. Remember, this info can be retrieved and viewed by almost anyone with a computer and internet access.

Case in point, I read that a girl was on an online dating site and was emailed by a guy who seemed to show interest in her. Eventually, they met and he turned out to be a creep. But during their date, she told him her true name and phone number, as well as the area she lived. His later emails took a nasty turn, where he started to scare her. It turned out that with the info provided to him, he had all the information he needed. He began to stalk her. He would write emails to her describing the clothes she was wearing. At least she was quick headed. She called the police and he was arrested. Now that example was a bit extreme, but it did happen! In social sites like Facebook and MySpace, people give their whole life history, making it all to easy for evil minded people to prey on them. Come on people, use your head!
Why would you ever put that much personal information on a public site? But people do! And some pay the consequences.

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goodmen

Almost every time I log on to an online dating site, I seem to see the same recurring question line from the female members. That being, “Are there any good men left?” I believe the answer is a big YES, there are! Now everybody has probably gotten burned in a relation. It’s just one of those things that occur in that thing we call, life.

Mostly, it is as a result of a bad past relationship. Perhaps the guy didn’t have money (a very common gripe with women) as they like to feel financially secure, perhaps he didn’t hold the door open for her (another common gripe), thereby failing in chivalry. Oh jeez, execute them right now!

But it is not always the males fault either. We would love to give you everything you want, but it is not always possible to do so. On ther other hand, why do all the women on these sites want to be treated like the princesses they think they are, or the one time the guy doesn’t hold the door open because may be something other than her was on his mind, he is instantly labeled.

Women seem way too quick to judge an individual man, let alone all men. Maybe when they stop believing that they are ultra special creatures to whom the guy has to be worthy, they will get more out of the relationship. Remember the saying, the more you want, the less you’ll get, and the same goes vice versa. So, to you ladies, there is something for you to think about!

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importantdate1

Does anyone else have trouble remembering important dates? Not necessarily the dates of holidays, but those that take place within relationships. Personally, I have trouble with both! It’s not that I try NOT to remember, I simply don’t always remember! And I always pay for it in the end.

Take the time I forgot my girlfriends birthday! All hell broke loose on that momentous day! And I guess, rightfully so! I just forgot. I’ve also been known to forget which day is Valentine’s Day! And you can imagine the massacre that resulted from that! Lol

I’ve tried calendars, my computer, and various electronic planners, but somehow, I still forget. Now I’m beginning to see a pattern emerging. But then again, I have been known to come to work on Thanksgiving, and forget my own birthday! Awful as that sounds, it happens to be true.

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91181-119
Affluence on Common Ground

How simply marvelous it would be if both the guy and the girl were on the same page, in terms of affluence. Money, or lack of it, is of major concern when in a relationship. If the guy has money, and the girl doesn’t, it is ok since the man likes to have that control, and feels good in the process by being able to take her to nice places, which she appreciates. But if the girl is the breadwinner, she will, by her nature, soon tire of providing for the man. It rarely goes both ways.

But when people of affluence get together, it is whole new ballgame.
People of affluence, whether obtained by hard work, or by inheritance, can live in the world, not bothered by the realities of bills, food, rent, etc., like most of us poor mortals do! They can indulge comfortably in life’s pleasures without the worries of, if it is affordable, or how will I ever pay for it. That gives them a certain freedom that few of us will ever know.

Usually, affluent people go to better schools, thus having a better education. This helps them to appreciate things the average person doesn’t. It doesn’t make them any better, but it does provide the opportunity. For example, I have a boat, they have a yacht. I eat a burger, they eat filet mignon. I went to community college, they went to Harvard. All things equal, we have the same things, but we have to be aware of our expenditures. The affluent do not have to deal with this concern.

Affluent couples live their lives on another plane of existence. They travel in circles of other affluent people, the wealthy, the captains of industry, the leaders of society. Those people whose word have meaning. If it sounds like I am jealous… I guess I am!

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